Strength

April 30, 2017

The most amazing thing just happened!!  I opened up my blog to write and discovered that the last time I was here was EXACTLY one year ago today!!  Wait, what?!!

After going through an excruciating amount of password checking, rechecking and sorting, I found my way through a couple over zealous computer gaffs from the past year.  Turns out I've got a whole new Google presence, name and password, for now just gumming up the works.  I've just got to start writing and stop with all the distractions!!  (like changing passwords!!)

I came up with the idea in my mediation this morning that my blogging just needed a little more form to get started.  So I drafted a lead line or 'title' if you will and sat down with my computer to start writing from that line and sharing my oh so in-depth wisdom and knowledge about this great lead line I came up with!!  Ha ha ha!!  I crack myself up sometimes.  Boy oh boy did the universe have other ideas for me today!!  Well duh!! It always does!  ;)

So I open my computer, resurrected the last 'draft' in blogger and here we are - a year to date. AWESOME!!

And contrary to my own best thinking and theme making, today is my friend Richard's memorial. It'd be best I decided to not make today so much about me my diet, my pictures, my eloquence, my success and failures etc., but rather instead, allow and invite this time to be for Richard.  My heart just softened.

I'm sitting by the fire here at Jim and Richard's fabulous house being a small part of the memorial Jim is creating for Richard or Ricardo or Little Ricky, as he loves to call him, for today.  Later this afternoon about 100 people will come through this beloved home of theirs and hug Jim and share stories and grieve and celebrate the amazing, wonderful, loving, living, colorful, creative life of Richard Neilund.  Certainly, if ever there was a life well lived, savored, enjoyed, relished, reveled, and made better by, it was by this dear man.  He lived 91 years and gobbled up every juicy moment of them all.

Another extraordinary coincidence I can help but ponder is that Richard and my father were the same ages.  So for the past 30 years I've been watching and living the juxtaposition of these two men.  The differences could not be more extreme starting and ending with the beautiful extra handful of years Richard outlived my dad.  And where my dad and I had our many shortcomings, those enter no where near my life next to Richards.  Thank goodness, right?!!  I was given a positive view of the potential of family and I didn't even know that was what was happening!

I met Richard's partner Jim just before my long ago pre-wedding, get prepared by coloring your hair plan.  I was referred by a friend and he became my hair colorist.  Jim saw me through the many years I was convinced I had to make my hair different from nature's intentions and slowly slowly, we got to know each other better.  After a long summing me up (and funny!!  I thought I was summing him up!!), I was invited to come more into his life and meet Richard.  I began by visiting their summer vacation on Cape Cod where they were 'coincidentally' near my summer home.  Instantly I was hooked and began the journey of building my own family of choice through the generosity and spirit of both of these deeply loving men.  Mind you this is all happening unconsciously and even unbeknownst to me really.  But I keep showing up for various invites from Jim and Richard and our lives slowly become more and more entwined over the passing of many years.  I've been a single mum for most of this time and the steady support and drum beat like consistency of the celebrations and inclusions by Jim and Richard helped anchor the stormy seas that prevailed for many years for me.

It's only been recently in this 30 year story that I began to fully appreciate just how profound their holiday invites were.  There were many years that I would find myself alone on Thanksgiving or New Year's or just some lonely Sunday, only to find there was always a place in their celebration for me.

The temptations for regret about whether or not I adequately shared my gratitude with Richard must now be translated into ongoing support, inclusion and love (all easy to do!!) for Jim.

I'm bringing my peace of mind, my presence and strength to this day to share in the laughter, tears, stories and celebrations of a life I so deeply admire and strive to emulate as I continue to build my circle of family and friendship.  Thank you Richard!

Vegan - Gluten Free Cornbread

Vegan - Gluten Free Cornbread

Grease as 8 x 8-inch pan or make 12 muffins

1 cup almond flour
1 cup organic yellow cornmeal, stone-ground and NOT genetically modified!!
2 teaspoons aluminum-free baking powder
½ teaspoon aluminum-free baking soda
½ teaspoon fine grain sea salt
1 cup almond milk plus 1 Tbs cider vinegar
½ cup coconut oil or olive oil
2 Tbs ground flax seeds mixed with 6 Tbs water and allowed to set  for a few minutes
4-6 Tablespoons honey or maple syrup
1 cup COOKED quinoa
1 cup fresh or frozen corn kernels

1. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees.
2. Mix flour, cornmeal, baking powder, baking soda and salt.  Add buttermilk, coconut oil, flax seeds and maple syrup until just combined.  Stir in the quinoa and corn kernels.  Pour into the prepared pan.
3. Bake the cornbread in the 8 x 8 pan for 30-35 minutes or the muffins for 15-18 minutes or so.

Christmas Vacation Steamed Veggie Dumplings!

Let's have steamed veggie dumplings for dinner!  Yeah, ok, sounds good, I said.  On my way to the market to shop for these 'steamed veggie dumplings', I was regretting my often overly accommodating nature.  But onward to the good ol' Stop and Shop I went in search of won ton wrappers, sure that I should at least be making this part by hand.  THANK GOD I settled on store bought wontons!!  

For the veggies inside;


dice very small;
2 Tbs ginger
2 cloves garlic
2 cups Napa Cabbage
1/2 red pepper
handful water chestnuts
4 baby corns from a can
shredded carrots, about 2
shredded celery, about 2 stalks
1/2 bunch parsley
1/2 bunch scallions
1/2 block firm tofu


in sesame or olive oil,
saute the ginger and garlic but do not brown
add cabbage and all other veggies 
cook until tasty (about 8-10 minutes)


1 package WONTON's from the cold case in the produce section at Stop and Shop


Smear a little water around the edges of the wrappers, dollop on about a teaspoon of your yummy veggie mixture and seal wrapper like a little package.  


You need a steamer for this part.  I have a bamboo one which I lined with some of the outer leaves from the Napa cabbage.  Make a layer of your veggies dumplings and steam for 10 minutes.


Now make the sauce;


1/4 cup soy sauce
2 Tbs rice vinegar
splash of roasted sesame oil
little spoonful of shredded ginger


When the dumplings are done, you will love them dunked in this little sauce.  We cruised through about 30 of these little numbers.  Eat while hot and enjoy.  


If we were in New York right now we would have ordered them from our Chinese take out place.  Since we are all here on the Cape I tried to make them from scratch.  Not really so hard in the end, bet you can do it too.  If you want to borrow my steamer you can.  


Oh, and now I've been reminded that "steamed vegie dumplings" were actually my idea from the get go!!  Geesh.

Curry Chickpea and Roasted Butternut Squash soup

Hi there!

That troublesome question of "What's for lunch?" can today best be answered with this yummy soup.

This is really a good one if you like curry and chickpeas.  I'm always on the look out for vegetarian alternatives to the usual standard lunch and dinner fares.   I don't know how I stumbled on to this soup but one day I just happened to have all the ingredients in my fridge, left overs from their various other meals, and they all ended up in the pot together.  Yum!!

With a big change in diet away from carbohydrates, dairy and corn; hummus had become a staple.  This was probably by default while I sought after broadening our healthy eating choices to what has now settled into a mostly gluten free lifestyle.  A staple in my gluten and cheese free fridge are chick peas.

Also, a little known fact about me is that I'm a pushover for butternut squash.  I love it roasted, smashed, with butter or without, with olive oil, or not, and always lots and lots of salt and pepper.  And especially on Thanksgiving with a little brown sugar and maple syrup; to die for!

For this soup I just happened to have had some leftover butternut squash from the night before.  It had been simply roasted with olive oil, salt and pepper.

Here's the soup!

Curry Chickpea and Roasted Butternut Squash Soup

In a large soup pot saute in olive oil (without browning!) the following;

1 small/ medium onion, diced and
several cloves of garlic, minced

After about 10 minutes or so when the onions have become translucent,
Add;


1 Tbs curry powder or more to your liking
some cumin
some paprika

Cook 2 minutes more
Then add;


4-5 carrots cut in approximately 1" pieces
4-5 celery stalks, cut the same
and saute another 5 - 10 minutes still without browning!

Then add;

-2 cups cooked chick peas (canned are ok but you can easily cook these yourself from dried.  Just soak the night before then cook until done, according to package.
-1 cup or so, roasted butternut squash (cut in 1" chunks, toss with olive oil,  salt and pepper and roast in a fierce over for about an hour turning once or twice along the way)
-1 cup chopped tomatoes (Pomi or canned is fine, fresh are good too) (they aren't essential either, so skip you don't have any)

Stir in;

1 small can coconut milk
4 cups chicken stock or enough to cover
salt and pepper

Since everything is already cooked, just gently boil this hearty brew for a few more minutes.  That will ensure proper cooking of the broth and allow flavors at least a little time to mingle.  I then take about 80% of the soup and puree it in my blender or food processor.  This gives it both a smooth(er) texture while maintaing some of it's country heartiness.   Then serve immediately and enjoy!!

Walker Pond

June 6, 2011


"Asparagus sandwiches?!"  


I thought she was nuts.   


Then I stopped reacting, thought about it for a few seconds and had to admit they kinda sounded good.  But better than the asparagus roll up which they turned into, was the part where we would go canoeing and eat them as a picnic dinner on a lake or pond of our choosing.  


We searched the map in the foyer and chose Walker's pond in Brewster, not to far from home.  I made the Asparagus roll-ups, we packed up the car, loaded the canoe on top and headed off for a late evening trip.  


The wind had dyed down nicely, the weather warmed up and it was still early enough in the eve to avoid the inevitable mosquito.   As soon as we arrived at the put-in, we saw a family of swans as well as some kind of a heron which we were later able to identify.  Some kind of a 'night heron' I think she said.  Realizing we forgot a camera on this trip we quickly improvised, packed my phone and headed out on to the pond.


For the most part we were getting the provisioning, packing, and maneuvering of the canoe into a more manageable arrangement.  From having gone off on our first voyage with nothing save an extra sweatshirt and the camera, we decided a couple of slight upgrades would add a little something to at least our peace of mind if not our general overal safety.  We were to be out on the water after all.  To that end we outfitted the canoe with a small anchor, extra ties, a first aid kit, and waterproof carry bags to put all our stuff in.  Now we could travel in style, we had somewhere formal and secure to stash the picnic, the camera and many other yet to be invited items.  And of course we had addressed safety.  


During all this procurement of the 'right stuff' for the canoe, I began to worry that we would lose the spontaneity and lightness of that first trip.  But just as the asparagus sandwiches turned out to be delicious in their simplicity, so too did the outfitting of the canoe with just a couple modest additions.  Some obvious organization  allowed for the packing and loading of the canoe onto and off of the car and in and out of the water to stay practically seamless.  Except for the part where I fell down just as we were about to drop the boat in the water that is!!  


Good thing I can make one heck of an Asparagus roll-up.

Uncle John

Travelling in Maine this weekend in search of family. Uncle John passed away last week and my cousins held a memorial up in Bangor. Dad and Connie went together and I met them there. It was really good to go and see everyone!! Sad on so many levels;

Alcoholism - this illness has devastated my family. Isolation and inertia reign. Obesity and unhappiness rule and alcohol controls it all.

Uncle John - haven't seen him since Dan's funeral. Nor any of his children. Whoa. I guess a lot happens in 10 years.

The saddest part - Aunt Nancy, who happened to be living in the SAME nursing home as her long time ex husband John, died the night before his memorial. Whoa!! So essentially those kids just lost both their parents at the same moment!! Yikes. I just felt really sad around the whole thing; not being any part of their lives in any way over all these years. Now I know I've been busy and they aren't a part of my life either, but still the whole loss was hard.

Maine - This place is awesome. Driving is beautiful, hiking is fun, people are great. Can't wait to come back but I've got to get home for now.

Freeport, Bath, Bangor, Belfast, Bar Harbor. Phew and time to go!

April 10, 2008

New York City; I miss my life here. Exactly what parts I can't say for sure, I just miss it. I'm sitting in my office looking out over and across the park toward the Met and all the trees are just budding in early colors of spring; there is a soft hazeiness in the air and around the trees with there red and greeniness. A short walk in the park yesterday had me passing thousands of daffodils and endless forsythia. Spring is here for sure.

I'm enjoying coffee and a grapefruit, my favorite breakfast and Morgan is asleep downstairs. I'll leave in a few minutes to run an errand but because it's Good Friday I don't have to worry about moving the car first so I have a few moments to write. I don't know why I feel like writing when I'm here in the city. I just do. Actually I'm going to see my doctor this morning, one of the benefits of being here. I'm relieved to have the opportunity to take care of myself. Self care is a challenging subject for me.

Yesterday Morgan and I did some dress shoping together for graduation. She has found a woman to make her a dress that fits her beautifully and will look great on her. We went to her studio so that Morgan could try on the draft and pick the fabric. She must wear white for graduation. I was also able to find a dress that will work for me as well. I can relax now.

I went to the movies with my old radio show co-host Michael Pisacane yesterday at 11am!! We saw "I Love You Man". Oh my God, we both laughed for two solid hours. We both totally got all the jokes and wished like crazy that we had written it ourselves and wondered why we hadn't. Hmm.